Space Cabbie - The Madding Crowd, Part 12 - Ray Wonsowski

See last week's episode for previous chapter links.

Layout:
1122
3333
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(I'd love to see this done in the style of Bruce Timm...)

Panel 1- Space Cabbie's yellow rocket cab coming around out of the dark side of the moon. It's towing Lobo's skull face space cycle behind it.

CAPTION: If you want to keep your hack license, you gotta be a member of S.C.A.R.E., Space Cabbies Against Reckless Endangerment...

(From the back of the cab, with musical notes): Danaa-dant-dant-dant-dant-danaa-dada....

(From the back of the cab, with musical notes): Word's spreadin'round...'bout that lunar town...on the point they call LaGrange... If you wanna know...

Panel 2- Inside the cab. In the back, VRIL DOX has his head lolled back, and visibly drunk playing air guitar. LOBO, also drunk, is terrified and surprised as he reaches over the front seat in panic at something out the windshield. SPACE CABBIE sees what's being pointed at, but his expression is wide-eyed open-mouthed disbelief.

CAPTION: Nothing worse than a drunk behind the stick. Except maybe these two...

VRIL DOX(with musical notes): Danaa-dant-dant-dant-dant-danaa-dada....

LOBO: ...where you wanna gOHMYFRAGGIN'FRAGWHATTHEFRAG?!?!?

Panel 3- In front of the moon, nearly the same size, the gate opened by Eclipso's Sunset Gun from Earth is being pried open by three staggeringly enormous hairy spider legs with talon-like tips from the darkness within. Glowing from behind the black are a pair of groups containing hundreds of red insectoid eyes. The yellow space cab is little more than a speck before it as it tries to spin away, Lobo's bike whipped around behind it.

CAPTION: ...and this.

LOBO: (from inside the cab) FRAG!!

...to be continued....

Lobo & Vril Dox's song based on ZZTop's "La Grange", you know, you probably heard it in Armageddon or some road trip movie....

Space Cabby – Baker & Grodd’s Inexplicable Adventure! – MK Stangeland Jr.

(It’s been nearly two years since the last time we checked in on the unlikely yet fan-favorite duo of ANIMAL MAN and GORILLA GRODD – seems another visit is in order.

This time, the two found themselves somehow stranded far away from Earth! Good thing SPACE CABBY was there to lend a hand! Or is it…?)

(5 Panels)

Panel 1: ANIMAL MAN and GORILLA GROOD are stuffed in the back seat of SPACE CABBY’s SPACE CAB. ANIMAL MAN looks like he should be a lot more uncomfortable than he’s letting on, but he’s hiding just how squished he is right now for the sake of keeping thing – and GRODD – peaceful. In an unusual turn of events, SPACE CABBY looks concerned as he drives.

SPACE CABBY (1): Uh oh…

GRODD: ‘Uh Oh’ what?

SPACE CABBY (2): Seems we have a problem the likes of which I’ve never seen.

SPACE CABBY (3): I have no idea where we are!

Panel 2: GORILLA GRODD looks ready to get violent, but ANIMAL MAN is doing a pretty good job of holding him back. For the moment, at least.

GRODD: I swear, if you don’t fix that problem, I will feast on your brains!

ANIMAL MAN: My apologies for my friend here.

Panel 3: ANIMAL MAN looks at GRODD with a ‘tsk tsk shame on you’ look.

GRODD is not amused.

ANIMAL MAN: As I keep trying to tell him, he has anger issues.

Panel 4: ANIMAL MAN leans forward to see if he can help SPACE CABBY with his problem. He also looks secretly relieved to get a brief moment to stretch, if only just a little.

ANIMAL MAN: What seems to be the problem?

SPACE CABBY (1): I’m not quite sure.

SPACE CABBY (2): It’s almost as if…

BUGS BUNNY: (Off Panel) Eh…

SFX: *munch munch*

Panel 5: SPACE CABBY, ANIMAL MAN, and GORILLA GRODD all look out the windows. Standing there, leaning on the cab and enjoying a carrot is BUGS BUNNY.

This panel should also give us the first real good look at their surroundings, which should look like a wilderness scene taken from a LOONY TUNES cartoon.

BUGS BUNNY: Like ya took a wrong turn as Albaquoique?

SFX: *munch munch*

(END PAGE)

Space Cabby – Special Delivery – Travis M. Holyfield

Panel 1: Exterior. Deep space. Cab #7433 zips through the panel, with four members of the Green Lantern Corps in hot pursuit. One of the Lanterns has created a giant megaphone and is yelling through it.

GREEN LANTERN: YOU IN THE CAB! YOU ARE IN VIOLATION OF GALACTIC SPEED LIMITS AND TRAVEL SAFETY LAWS! HALT AT ONCE AND SHUT DOWN YOUR VEHICLE’S DRIVE SYSTEM!


Panel 2: Interior of the cab. Space Cabby’s hat is cocked back on his head, and he is sweating from tension.

SPACE CABBY: Sorry, fellas! I’m normally a very law-abiding sort, but I’ve got a lady in here about to have a baby!


Panel 3: Close-up on Space Cabby’s hand grabbing the thrust control for his cab.

 

Panel 4: Close-up of Space Cabby slamming the thrust control to full.    

 

Panel 5: Exterior. The Green Lanterns pull up short as the Cab blasts away from them.  

Panel 6: Interior. Space Cabby looks into his rear view mirror.

SPACE CABBY: Don’t you worry now, ma’am. We’ll be at that Med Vessel in no time! 


Panel 7: Interior. The back seat of the cab. LOBO is dressed like a pregnant woman – big flowered dress, big flowered hat. His hand is clutched over a fake stomach, which is likely concealing a bag of ill-gotten gains.

LOBO: Heh.  

 

Why Space Cabby?

Because... because he's a cab driver. IN SPACE!

Created by Otto Binder and Howard Sherman, Space Cabby was originally introduced in Mystery in Space in 1954. He served as a narrator for tales told to his fares, and later as a protagonist in his own stories. Hi tales have been penned by such all-time greats as Gardner Fox and drawn by legends like Gil Kane. In the modern age, Space Cabby has kept busy, teaming up with Lobo and Superman, and making an appearance in James Robinson's superb Starman series.

 

How does one get to be a Space Cabby? Well, our guy lives in the 22nd century, driving for 9-Planet Taxi. A natural at stellar navigation, he was once a fighter pilot, before picking up the keys to Cab #7433. He is a member of the 'Cosmic Order Of Space Cab Pilots' and 'Veterans Of Alien Wars'.

I have always loved the stranger, more fringe characters of the DC Universe. And ever since I read that particular issue of Starman, I have been obsessed with the idea of Space Cabby. Because, again, he's a cab driver. IN SPACE.

Yes, at least half of my love for this character is in the giggle-factor. Just saying his name genuinely makes me laugh. But the storytelling potential of a character like this is unlimited. Sure, he's probably not A-List material. I certainly don't envision DC green-lighting a SPACE CABBY series or anything. But how much fun would a Mystery in Space anthology be? And Space Cabby could be right there, anchoring the book, telling his fares stories about Adam Strange, and Lobo, and the Legion of Super Heroes. Like a cosmic Crypt Keeper. With a taxi. IN SPACE!